TO MASHIMA,WITH LOVE! APRIL 2011.

It happened so suddenly, that all of us,who had the good fortune,and privilege, of being in Mashima's life,were completely stunned,speechless,and unable to move.I remember every incident leading to that fateful moment,and I don't think I can ever forget,or pretend, it doesn't matter.Because it does!Its been a very big blow for me,and I'm still limping my way around,trying to handle the sudden emptiness inside me, that is all engulfing.I feel lonely,lost,blank,and miss her,every moment,of each day.People try to sympathise, to explain, that this is life,and it must go on , and I have to keep moving with it. But none of those people, shared,and enjoyed, a 15 yr. relationship,with one of the MOST outstanding,extraordinary,exemplary human beings ,God gifted me with,and who filled my life with happiness,and fulfilment, that I will always treasure,and cherish.Definitely some of the very BEST moments of my life.She showered me with deep love,and always stood with me,supporting,and comforting me,and giving me the strength,and courage to just keep going.Oh! God.How I miss her!Where will I find a friend,philosopher,and guide like her?

It was a Sunday,and I had gone with some friends, for a picnic ,to a lovely farm house,on the outskirts of Pune.It was a lovely experience, a very enjoyable day,and I returned home,in a very happy,satisfied mood.Here, I must say, that I have been very lucky, to have really good friends, who love me,care for me, and are always there, to help out, whenever the situation calls for it.And this picnic was specially organised, "Because you love going out,and will enjoy yourself!"Which indeed, I did!But,as soon as I returned, the phone rang,and I just fell into the nearest chair. My heart was thumping away, and my mind completely blank.No! This was just not possible!It cannot be true!No! No! No!I wanted to scream,but I felt as if I had lost my voice.From the other side, I vaguely heard a voice say,"UR Mashima just left!She has gone away!"Even as I write this, I feel as if my heart has been cut up in ribbons,and the blow,impossible to accept,or realise.Mashima gone?
But one has to face,accept,and be graceful about reality, no matter how impossible,or tough it may be,for that is the only way to go.And although I am well past 70,have faced many,very severe blows in life,I just couldn't stand up to this blow, which hit me more that I could have ever imagined.Because it was totally unexpected,sudden, when no one expected it.She was almost 90, but more active that a 50 yr.old,and her love knew no bounds.She greatly enjoyed looking after her whole family, and I was very special to her,a relationship, probably from our previous birth.This is what Hinduism teaches,and my father,and father-in-law, greatly believed in.They passed this belief to me,during my most memorable,and precious moments with them,as long as they lived.

I met Mashima,after they shifted into the apartment just below ours,and my neighbour said,"Aunty, a Bengali family has shifted here,have you met them?"No, I hadn't,but one day,while returning home,a very sweet elderly lady,looked at me, with a very warm,beautiful smile, and said,"Oh! You must be Jonaki! I've heard so much about you.Now I can get to know you better!"And indeed we did.From a very slow,cautious start,it soon blossomed into a wonderful friendship,and we were almost inseparable.Not a day went by,when we didn't see each other,shared our joys,and sorrows,ups,and downs,and always moved together.She was a great fan of my cooking,and I enjoyed making her favourite dishes,which she enjoyed,
effusively.She too was an excellent cook,and I marvelled at the ease, with which she turned out delicacies,at the drop of a hat.

But more than anything,Mashima was a person par excellence,an extraordinary human being,of grace,class,culture,and dignity,and took everything in her stride,both the good,and the bad.I loved and admired her,and she gave me so much love,that today,even in my loneliness, I feel honoured,and privileged, to have had her in my life,and spent beautiful years with her.After she left, for days, I was completely blank,my mind just refused to function,and I felt as if, half my body was gone.It was too difficult to handle,and, since I live alone, it was extra painful.I still wish the phone would ring,and she would ask me to make her favourite sweets,or sambhar,green mango jam,nimki,and the innumerable things she so loved to eat.But reality is tough to handle,and each person has to find a way out.But I will love Mashima forever,because she was my dearest,and best friend,and gave me very valuable lessons, on how to be a good person,above all else.And I will make every endeavour to follow whatever she said, as my tribute to a great lady,my best friend,my inspiration,guide,and a very precious part of my life.R.I.P Mashima,chirodin bhalobeshe jaabo,jaemon aapni dekheiyechen.